3 THINGS I'VE LEARNED NOT TO DO

[RICK YOUNG]

1. You don't pull on Superman's cape:eek:

2. You don't check the level of a battery by holding a match over the battery.

KAPOP!!!!:eek::eek:

circa 1969. Checking over my 63 Merc Meteor in a friends heated pig barn.

A friend with a heated pig barn in the middle of a cold Iowa winter is a

"good friend indeed".

3. You don't use Brake Cleaner to check for engine oil leaks with a hot ,

running 63 nailhead:eek::eek::eek:.

I am not smart enough to accept the advise of a very wise man who told

me it was a Valley Pan gasket. So when trying to find the leak I shot some

Brake Clean on the oily spot near the Distributer and WHHHOOOOFFF!

A quick eye brow trim.

I now hold the Jewell School Record (hoping to finally get that diploma next year)for the 40 Yard Dash (in just 4 giant leaps) from the driveway to the garage for the fire extinguisher.

[trimacar]

You could also add that a person needs to be careful when working on an old car's electrical system, should that person happen to have a pacemaker.

I won't mention names, not me though, a good friend.......

The good news is, it wasn't a Lucas pacemaker...........

[Restorer32]

Never give your inquisitive 5 year old son a hand operated vacuum pump to play with. Took the suck marks on his face weeks to totally disappear.

[Guest brh]

Never work, on or near a battery that smells like sewer gas. Run!! Not only do they make a lot of noise when they blow, the flying debri and acid is a bit tough on clothes, skin and thank goodness it was my back, not in the eyes.

[Bhigdog]

Never remove the charger cables from a charging battery with charger still energized. KABLOOEY!................Bob

[Guest Dans 77 Limited]

Never ignore your neighbor when they are yelling thru your front door "Excuse me but did you know your truck is on fire ?"

Dan

[RICK YOUNG]

4. Do not install a remote start kit on a pickup with manual transmission that does not have a neutral safety switch.

Addendum B.. Do not bypass the clutch safety switch or wrap a zip tie to activate it.

Addendum C... Do not leave transmission parked in "granny low".

Quote wife;

" Your truck is driving down the street........by itself"

Story to be told at the next National.

Edited October 27, 2011 by RICK YOUNG (see edit history)

[Ben Bruce aka First Born]

Riiick!!!! Too far away.

Ben

[Restorer32]

Never and I mean NEVER get distracted by a phone call and continue snapping over a suspected faulty magneto that you absentmindedly rested in your lap so you could take the call. Talk about the shortest distance to ground!

Never open the valve to an acetylene headlight, turn away momentarily to answer an employee's question then return to light the lamp. Who needs eyebrows anyway?

[Dandy Dave]

Never open the little door on an oil furnace that has been loaded up with oil to check the flame after it fires. :eek: Yup, I have experiance. . After over 40 years of wrenching, I've about experianced about all of it mechanical. Been bit by mags/ ignition systems. Had carbuetors on fire. Exploding batterys. Had an old tire that was dry rotted blow up. Had an old 74 chevy truck on fire because of a rats nest in the heater box near the heater speed coils. Had diesels run away because the rack in the injection pump was stuck. Most of it when I was young. Seems I am a lot more careful now that I have gathered some wisdom. Funny thing though, The older I get, The Dumber I feel. When I was 14, I knew everything. Dandy Dave!

[Restorer32]

We rebuilt a 6 cylinder 1000 cu in ALF Fire Engine engine. Unbeknownst to us these engines are notorious for sucking unburned fumes from the carb thru the oil fill, which is located directly behind the carb. If you aren't careful these gas fumes can accumulate in the pan and eventually explode. Picture my Son behind the wheel operating the spark and throttle while I bend over the engine hand choking the carb. Picture me saying "Ok, try it again". Now picture a huge ball of flame and smoke and the front timing cover exploding into about 15 pieces and flying across the shop. Took maybe 20 minutes for my heart to return to normal but luckily no one was hurt. Cost $350 for another timing cover. Twisted up the fan but happily only did minor damage to the very large and very expensive newly purchased honeycomb radiator core. Would have made a great YouTube Video.

[TexRiv_63]

Only 3 things? OK;

• Don't jack up a car with two bumper jacks inside a single car garage. (Fell off the jacks to one side and got wedged inside. Only cure was to jack it up again and push it over in the other direction)
  
• Don't try to set the fast idle speed on a Plymouth 440 GTX in gear with just a 2 by 4 under the front tire. (Dented the GTX bumper, garage door, and 64 Ford inside garage)
  
• Don't get a gasoline-soaked piece of aluminum foil anywhere near the battery (No explanation needed!)
  

It's amazing I lived to grow up...

[TxBuicks]

Never lean over a 4 barrel spread bore carburetor while the engine is running to see if the back butterfly valves are opening when you 'give it the gas'. It took 3 weeks for my eyebrows to grow back

Also, be sure the car is in gear BEFORE you disconnect the tow cable. It is a bad feeling watching your car slowly coast down the driveway and into the neighbors fence 50 yards away.

[Ron Green]

NEVER have the wires of your timing light close to the fan blades. When occupied with getting the timing dead on they can be sucked right into the fan. While you are running to the ignition switch; the cables and light are quickly wrapping around the fan with pieces of plastic flying everywhere. The strobe makes everything appear to be in slow motion (until the cables are ripped off the battery).

[Restorer32]

Never disconnect the neutral safety switch on a '65 T Bird and lay over the engine to adjust the carb with the car running and inadvertently bump the car into gear unless you enjoy riding thru a closed fibreglas garage door and crashing into a parked rollback truck thereby breaking a hip in several places. Happened to an acquaintance. $2000 damage to the T-Bird, no idea what the hip cost.

[TxBuicks]

Never be so accommodating to your 6 your old son that you let him sit behind the steering wheel of a running 1963 Invicta station wagon and tell him he can have fun with the lightswitch, radio, windshield wipers, etc., but do not touch that gear shift handle on the steering column. I was lucky. He went into N.

Edited October 28, 2011 by TxBuicks (see edit history)

[buick840]

• NEVER check for a loose spark plug wire with the engine running.............even more important
  
• NEVER try doing the above just after pressure washing the engine.....OUCH
  

[John_Maine]

Never trade cars without telling the wife first.

[Bill Stoneberg]

Dont trust your car with a manual trans on a slanted driveway. You will one day be walking between 2 cars and your old car will jump out of gear and start rolling down the driveway. If your wheel is not straight, the car will put catch you between the 47 Buick and the 88 Buick, If this happens you end up stuck and there is a bent door panel from your knees and a butt sized dent in the front fender of the 47. You legs turn all black and blue and you cant get out from between the cars as your legs are crushed. You will then have to call the police to get you out because all the windows are closed and the wife cant hear you because of A / C.

Edited October 29, 2011 by Bill Stoneberg (see edit history)

[Restorer32]

Ouch!

[buick5563]

Ouch!

All of these are "Ouch"!

I need a nap.

[Booreatta]

isnt experience wonderful, it lets you recognize a mistake when you make it again???????????

Chuck Kerls

[Marty Roth]

Re-Read Trimacar's Post ( #2 ) about an early car's electrical system and your (my) PACEMAKER.

Yes, I resemble that comment, and with good reason -- because I'm the poster child !!

The rest of the story, as Paul Harvey used to say:

A friend in our local club phoned me one Sunday in 2002, saying that he had taken his wife, sons and parents for a drive in his big, beautiful 1929 Buick Series 129, Model 29-57. The Buick began to run poorly, and upon entering his driveway, all aboard had to help push it into the garage. Naturally Joe called me for assistance since I have a reputation for being knowledgeable, and willing to help in almost any circumstance.

A quick grab of my heavily insulated linesman pliers on the sparkplug wire, and the resulting jump of a huge spark to the engine block told us that there was indeed "spark". Another quick check assurred that there was fuel at the updraft carburetor. My response was that it "should" run.

I grabbed my compression tester, unscrewed #1 of the six sparkplugs, and asked Joe to spin the engine -- the tester showed "zero compression", as did the same test on cylinders #2 and #3 --- my comment was that over the years the compression tester must have gone bad, SOOOOOOOO ----

------ I did what I would have done in the old days before I had fancy shmancy tools and equipment like a compression tester --------

------- I put my index finger over the hole for sparkplug #1, and my thumb over the hole for #2, at which point the 3 plug wires for the first 3 cylinders were draped over the rocker arm cover and I asked Joe to spin over the engine so I could get a feel for the compression.

Now, nobody told Joe to turn on the ignition switch, but nobody told him NOT to turn it on either ---- and when the engine rocked left and right, the three loose sparkplug wires came off of the rocker cover and landed over my right wrist ----- meanwhile, my left hand was on the firewall of the Buick, and as such, ---

--the shortest path to ground, for what I was told was maybe 20,000 volts, was dierectly from my right hand to my left hand, DIRECTLY THROUGH MY now 4-year-old PACEMAKER , at least for several seconds, after which I accomplished human flight, at least to the northern wall of Joe's garage.

The Cardiologist determined that my pacemeker was inoperable. The subsequent replacement revealed that, not only had the incident "fried" the circuitry in the pacemeker, but had also burned the insulation off the wires into the Atrium and Ventricular portions of my heart, both of which were necessary to regulate my heartbeat which would otherwise often slow to 20 beats / minute, and sometimes just stop. The heart muscle was also cauderized where the wires attached to the heart. The existing wires could not be removed without the possibility of inverting the heart, and were left in place. New wires were inserted, along with the implant of a new pacemaker which gave seven years of additional service.

As an aside, the new pacemaker, having outlived its useful life in 2009, was again replaced, but the newest proceedure resulted in infection, and the site would not heal -- SOOOO -- just before Hershey time, I went under the knife yet again, this time with a laser to remove the new pacemaker, its related sutures and staples, and the pairs of wires from both 2002 and 1998. Brand new wires were inserted on the opposite side of my chest into the heart, along with another new pacemaker (now my 4th one) was implanted, and is still operational.

Thankfully, it is made by Medtronic, and not, as Trimacar has so eloquently stated, by Lucas **** 2 years into its useful life, still functioning as designed, and with an estimated ten years remaining at the current rate of usage, even though I suspect my dependancy will increase.

The Cardiologist says I should not try to "Jump-start" any more Buicks, and he didn't know what to make of my questions regarding the Magneto on our old Oakland.

Re-Read Trimacar's comment in Post #2.

Edited October 29, 2011 by Marty Roth
typo (see edit history)

[Guest Dans 77 Limited]

Never be so accommodating to your 6 your old son that you let him sit behind the steering wheel of a running 1963 Invicta station wagon and tell him he can have fun with the lightswitch, radio, windshield wipers, etc., but do not touch that gear shift handle on the steering column. I was lucky. He went into N.

Or for that matter your 18 month old son sitting on your lap in your built up 454 powered 100+ MPH balls to the wall wreck chaser tow truck. You would not believe how fast he threw that truck into reverse.Luckily I was backed up against a wall to begin with. Had his first accident before he was out of diapers:eek:

Dan

[Mark Simmons]

Never let your young son test the the spark plugs on your running '47 Pontiac Silver Streak 8 by shorting them out one at a time to see which one is misfiring. Yes, yes the old screwdriver with the wood on each side of the shaft. It works great especially when you're small and up on the fender of dad's car. I made it clear to the back lawn in one giant leap? for kid kind. Never no never allow your dad near the garage that you are rewiring for him so he can actually see what he is doing in there. Especially when he comes in the door next to the power source and has a propensity for throwing the lever to see how you are doing------Thank GOD for wooden ladders. I don't know which of us learned the better lesson that day.

[wmsue]

Never use a bumper jack on the rear bumper of a 74 LeSabre and think you can stop the car from rolling forward after the back tire gets off the ground. Even when you grab the bumper jack with your hand and try and hold it back, the car just rolls very slowly and pins your hand between the jack and the tail light lens. Ouch.

[Restorer32]

Never use your head for a chock block...trust me on this.

[TexRiv_63]

Re-Read Trimacar's Post ( #2 ) about an early car's electrical system and your (my) PACEMAKER.

--the shortest path to ground, for what I was told was maybe 20,000 volts, was dierectly from my right hand to my left hand, DIRECTLY THROUGH MY now 4-year-old PACEMAKER , at least for several seconds, after which I accomplished human flight, at least to the northern wall of Joe's garage.

The Cardiologist determined that my pacemeker was inoperable. The subsequent replacement revealed that, not only had the incident "fried" the circuitry in the pacemeker, but had also burned the insulation off the wires into the Atrium and Ventricular portions of my heart, both of which were necessary to regulate my heartbeat which would otherwise often slow to 20 beats / minute, and sometimes just stop. The heart muscle was also cauderized where the wires attached to the heart. The existing wires could not be removed without the possibility of inverting the heart, and were left in place. New wires were inserted, along with the implant of a new pacemaker which gave seven years of additional service.

As an aside, the new pacemaker, having outlived its useful life in 2009, was again replaced, but the newest proceedure resulted in infection, and the site would not heal -- SOOOO -- just before Hershey time, I went under the knife yet again, this time with a laser to remove the new pacemaker, its related sutures and staples, and the pairs of wires from both 2002 and 1998. Brand new wires were inserted on the opposite side of my chest into the heart, along with another new pacemaker (now my 4th one) was implanted, and is still operational. QUOTE]

Marty, THAT is an amazing story! I hope you at least got salvage rights to all that old copper wire...

[Ron Green]

Dont trust your car with a manual trans on a slanted driveway.

Also applies to an automatic. At break time I watched the hotdog wagon from 7 floors up on a construction site gently bump into my 66 Impala, which popped out of gear and rolled down the road towards that skinny underpass by the new Hershey museum and Hershey Park. Luckily no cars were coming as it went down the middle of the road, around a corner and stopped in the middle of the underpass without a scratch.

[Marty Roth]

Don,

Ref: My Pacemaker,

Unfortunately the HMO and Medtronics who manufactured the pacemaker insisted on having it back for evaluation following the episode-----

I told them I'd rather give them Five Bucks as a "Core Charge"

By the way, the Glidden Tour is based in Brenham, TX next October, and hosted by friends --- is that anywhere near McKinney? We plan to drive it, having missed several due to my wife's job.

Edited November 1, 2011 by Marty Roth
typo (see edit history)

[Bleach]

Never place the palm of your hand over the carb of an engine, while someone is trying to start it, to see if it has sufficient air draw. A subsequent back fire through the carb can turn that hand into a hamburger - WELL DONE!

[Marty Roth]

Replacing a collapsed hydraulic valve lifter on our 1969 Pontiac Tempest (a 4-door Custom "S", with most of the GTO Ride and Handling options), I had the intake manifold off but was having trouble pulling the lifter which had worn through from the cam. - late, late at night, and just could not get a grip on it.

I decided to bump the engine over with the starter so that bad lifter would sit higher off the block, and I might be able to grip it with a pliers or vise-grip. As I turned the key to bump the starter, gas sgushed from the fuel line toward the removed carburetor, hitting the now energized distributor. The spark from the distributor ignited the gas, starting a fire. Bad enough that my precious Pontiac had an engine fire, but it was sitting in the garage of our 2-story home, right below our 2 children, fast asleep in their bedrooms.

I used both 10 lb dry chemical extinguishers, but the flames kept starting again.

It seemed an eternity waiting for the garage door opener, and I had to move two other cars out of the driveway so thay I could push the Pontiac out from under the bedrooms with flames shooting up to the garage ceiling.

The gas finally stopped pumping, and one more extinguisher finally killed the blaze.

When I think of what could have happened -- the kids, the house, us.....

It just didn't occur to me at 2 o'clock in the morning, that bumping the starter would shoot gasoline at a live distributor and start a fire under my kids' bedroom.

[Ben Bruce aka First Born]

Marty, McKinney is about 250 miles north of Brenham.

Ben

[Bill Stoneberg]

Marty,

Brenham is 50 Miles NW of Houston. Its a beautiful city with the Famous Blue Bell Ice Cream Factory in it. During the spring (if it rains) the wildflowers are great in that area. You will have fun.

[Marty Roth]

Bill,

Thanks - we've visited Brenhan before, when VMCCA hosted their first Heritage Tour based in Giddings, years ago.

My grandson Nathan and I drove our 1934 Buick, visited the Blue Bell Ice Cream factory and tasting room, Washington on the Brazos, and many other local area sites. It was a springtime tour, and the Texas Bluebonnets were in full bloom.

We also visited President Lyndon Johnson's boyhood home, the LBJ Library, Pres. G. H. W. Bush's Library , the many wonderful sites in Austin, and some back roads that are just right for touring in old cars.

Our dear friends, Jamie and Pat Crandall are hosting the Glidden Tour October 21 - 26, 2012, based in Brenham, and they are encouraging Brass and Model-T vehicles.

We'll do our best to oblige, hopefully driving our 1914 Buick B-37 Touring.

Of course all pre-1943 vehicles are welcome

[bhclark]

Never ask your wife to get in the car and rev the engine in gear to locate the source of a rattle when the car is jacked up by the FRONT wheels.

Luckily, that day she was smarter than me......

[Mark Simmons]

In Autoshop class a few decades ago the teacher assigned another vocational student and I the task of finding out why a newly rebuilt and installed '54 Buick engine would not turn completely over. After discussing and trying a few different things we put the car on the lift and pulled the oil pan off. The trouble was easily found with a drop light. A 10'' 3/8 drive extension was riding between two of the connecting rods. So a count your tools class was started the next day by the student that left the extension in the engine. Per the teacher's request.

[Guest brh]

In Autoshop class a few decades ago the teacher assigned another vocational student and I the task of finding out why a newly rebuilt and installed '54 Buick engine would not turn completely over. After discussing and trying a few different things we put the car on the lift and pulled the oil pan off. The trouble was easily found with a drop light. A 10'' 3/8 drive extension was riding between two of the connecting rods. So a count your tools class was started the next day by the student that left the extension in the engine. Per the teacher's request.

Along the same lines-- Never leave a socket in close proximity to a fan on a running engine, when it becomes air born after falling in the fan blade it can catch you just above the eye and cause the need for several stitches.

[old-tank]

3 THINGS I'VE LEARNED NOT TO DO: nah, don't believe it, I'm still getting burned, bruised, blinded, gagged, smoked, lacerated, deafened...and that was just this week.

Willie

[MrEarl]

All of these are "Ouch"!

I need a nap.

Have't heard yours yet Mike. Or are you savin them all for a book.