"duh"... dumbest lines in for sale ads

[Peter Gariepy]

I've read more automotive for-sale ads than I care to admit. Recently I was surfing Craiglist and stumbled on a few choice lines that absolutely drive me nuts!

• "Use to Run"... :mad:
  
• "Ready to Restore"... :cool:
  
• "Minor rust thru"...
  
• "All original"... then followed by... "New paint, upgraded to V8". :eek:
  
• "Classic"... (dont get me started) :eek:
  
• "Future Collectible"... i.e. used Pinto.
  
• "MINT"... followed by... "Salvage title" :confused:
  

Please share yours.

[Guest Backyardmechanic]

Yeah I get a kick out of adds on ebay too

Vern

[Dave Mellor NJ]

The most used one is "ran when parked". what car didn't? or,"Ready for restoration", what car isn't? I also heard of a person selling a Cadillac"El Dodo" and an old friend fondly recalled his younger days driving that 56 Mercury "Phantom"(4 door hardtop was actually a "Phaeton")

[Dave@Moon]

"Old Skool" b/w "Rat Rod". These 2 pair up like lonely bunnies.

[Dave@Moon]

And if I see another 350 2 barrel Buick or Olds described as a classic/legendary/etc. "muscle car" or "street machine" I think I'm gonna puke. I even once saw a 307 Nova being sold as a "muscle car".

[Earl B.]

Currently for sale on a certain internet auction site.......1941 Packard Model 1901B Sedan Convertible Item Description: Beautiful is the only word to describe this Packard........ The Packard models were the top of the line in luxury in 1941. The car is powered by a 500 cubic inch Cadillac engine. The suspension is a jaguar front suspension and a nova ten bolt rear. The car’s amenities are as follows: Power steering, power disc brakes, power windows, tilt steering column, digital dash components, air-conditioning, power front seats, real wire wheels.

Now, you can tell I'm a Packard person, but what I'd like to know is...If the seller thought the car was so top of the line, why was it necessary to change almost everything about the car??????...B

[Restorer32]

"Survivor" is the word that drives me crazy. Can someone please explain what that means? Survived for what, to be rodded? "Collectable" is another. Is there any thing that isn't collectable if someone decided to "collect" it? "Sympathetic restoration"? This usually means the owner couldn't afford to do the job right.

[real61ss]

A few years ago I saw a car at Carlisle, total rust bucket, it had a sign that said............."No rust in some spots"

[stock_steve]

• "Future Collectible"... i.e. used Pinto.
  
• 
  

I know you didn't mean to put down the people who love to collect Pintos, Peter!

Those were some classics.

I found a good mis-spelling when browsing car ads yesterday--there was a car that had many needed parts to restore it, including a "...zero moile rebuilt engine..."

OOF

(or should I say "OUCH")

Happy Holidays,

Steve from Stony Creek, CT

[trimacar]

I always like the search for "rare." By that, I mean seeing the ad that will state something like "1974 Whatsmobile, rare, 289,000 were built, but only a handful with the cigarette lighter delete option."

To me, a car isn't rare if you have to explain why it's rare. The very fact of it being rare should be evident.

Thus, if you drive up to a show in a 1947 David three wheeler, no explanation is necessary.

[joe_padavano]

Yeah, I try not to let these bother me, but still...

"Numbers matching" is the best, particularly on older cars that don't even have a VIN derivative stamp on the block or trans. I like to ask the seller "can you show me the numbers that match?"

The other thing that gets me are people who are too lazy to walk out to the garage and check the spelling on the emblem on the car. Ads that list "Camero" or "Cutless", for example.

[Larry Schramm]

"runs great, just needs transmission rebuilt"

[trimacar]

My favorite all time is "easy restoration," an oxymoron for sure...............

[Restorer32]

"new paint, just needs rubbed out"

[Bob Hill]

I like the ads that say something like "only needs so and so part to be running great, costs less than $5". If it costs less than $5, why don't you buy it , fix it and sell it as a running car? :confused:

[Guest Jim_Edwards]

Among my favorite dumb lines:

1. "Frame off Restoration" when the car is a unibodied vehicle.

2. "Older Restoration" when the car looks as if it was ridden hard and put up wet one too many times.

3. "Engine has slight Knock, but runs well"......yeah right!

[trimacar]

And, as I've mentioned before, there's really no such thing as a "frame off restoration." It might be an "off frame restoration," or a "body off restoration," but there's not much that you can take the frame "off" other than front and rear axles.

And yes, agree, in any case the name doesn't apply to Cords, Mustangs, or any later model car with no separate, complete, frame.

[Steve_Mack_CT]

"Serious Only" is a tough one. While I have had tire kickers waste my time selling, I am often turned off by that in an ad and definately turned off when they go on and on "no test pilots, picture collectors", etc. OK pal, makes me warm and fuzzy about dealing with you...

I once called on some TR-6 parts advertised and the guy says, "what specifically are you looking for? I have had 10 calls today and all I have to show for it is an attitude" I told him we most likely are not going to get together on anything, but I was sure to share that info with the other club members I know... I happened to be with another friend - we both had TRs at the time, and cash in our pockets about a half hour away from this idiot on a Saturday morning looking at another TR-6. Hope he still has the stuff rotting in his basement...

[Guest Jim_Edwards]

Another..........

"Or Best Offer" ......... Just how long are they going to keep taking offers? Until the floors rust out?

And then there is the "never smoked in" Of course the cigar in the side pocket and ashtray told a different story.

[Steve_Mack_CT]

Then there is brutal honesty you just have to admire - "not for the faint hearted" or "not for a first restoration"

[trimacar]

How about "back seat never used" or "back seat never sat in....", guess those two are different......

[Guest Hinckley]

I ran across one a few years ago that seems to have been designed to ensure the truck did not sell. The ad noted it was an International Scout, diesel, two wheel drive, with extensive rust and a bad transmission. The closing line was that the roll over had not damaged the windshield.

[bhclark]

"Never seen rain"

Seriously, in 50+ years you or the 15 owners before you never got caught in a sunshower?

How about washing it? Isn't that water too?

[Guest greg walsh]

I saw one that read '' Brand new in 1968 ''.

[Guest South_paw]

A/C works just needs a charge. Yeah right!

My loss is your gain! Who could resist such a deal

[Steve Braverman]

When I bought my Franklin convertible, the ad said, "very rare and seldom seen."

It also said, "not a Ford."

Hmm

[Rusty_OToole]

How about no reasonable offer refused? Local dealers use this all the time, I feel like calling them up and congratulating them, and saying they probably sell more cars since they stopped refusing reasonable offers.

[auburnseeker]

There was an ad circulating on our local Craigslist for a 62? Chevy Pickup that read "runs and drives great, No engine" I swear that's the way it read all in the same line.

[Fleek]

My favorite, "wont last long". If it will not last, why would I want to buy it?

[ragtop4two]

I was at a swap meet and some guy had a challenger for sale, he said "buy it here and take it to barrett jackson and double your money" If it was that easy why didn't he take it there himself?

[Grimy]

My all-time favorite is the line included in a Hemmings ad of 30 years ago offering a pre-war Cad V8 which said, "Engine disassembled for your inspection." Quel droll!!

George

[Guest Skyking]

I love this one......Nash Metropolitan T3T4 TurboCharger Turbo Kit - eBay (item 260679765055 end time Jan-15-11 21:29:40 PST)

485 hp in a Met............:eek::eek:

[Earl B.]

Skyking, maybe he should add the line....NOT FOR THE FAINT OF HEART!!!!!...hahaha....B

[Guest Skyking]

Skyking, maybe he should add the line....NOT FOR THE FAINT OF HEART!!!!!...hahaha....B

:D:D

[Guest billybird]

I'm always leery of "recent paint". a.k.a. shot over whatever was under there so it would be easier to unload on some unsuspecting sucker! Show me a vehicle that has been painted a year or two and you can usually tell about how good a body or body work you have.

[PONTIAC1953]

yes, i get so tired of seeing all the listings on ebay where the sellers says "will fit", the last one i saw was a 49 to 55 cadillac hydra-matic transmission, listed as will fit a 1953 pontiac, i told the seller, it will not, bell housing bolt pattern different, torus and fluid coupling too big, tailshaft and housing too long, now more than ever, "buyer beware", charles coker, 1953 pontiac tech advisor.

[1937hd45]

"Must be seen!" yeah, I think it is a wize move to look at what you are thinking about buying.

[Dave@Moon]

yes, i get so tired of seeing all the listings on ebay where the sellers says "will fit", the last one i saw was a 49 to 55 cadillac hydra-matic transmission, listed as will fit a 1953 pontiac, i told the seller, it will not, bell housing bolt pattern different, torus and fluid coupling too big, tailshaft and housing too long, now more than ever, "buyer beware", charles coker, 1953 pontiac tech advisor.

If I could I'd rip that "compatibility" feature out of eBay Motors and put it where it can never be found again. Just for kicks, I checked my TR6 search page right now. I found 3 different fan belts (all of different dimensions), 2 different spark plugs from the same manufacturer, and 2 different size wiper blades. All of them were hit in the search only because the lister fed the machine that the item "fits TR6". Then I went to page 2 for the next 50 items listed....:mad:

When that first started to happen I'd check the listing, hoping to find a new source for plugs/hoses/etc. In nearly every case the lister marked whatever cars they could think of, often totally unrelated.

It wastes so much time I find myself not even looking for days, and missing items I should have bid on.

[bhclark]

Amen Dave. a few years ago, a search for 1959 buick would turn up less than 100 items. Now, thanks to "compatibility", the result is over 1200 and growing all the time. Too much garbage to sift through, although I have been special searches to remove some sellers and some keywords, but still a pain.

[Dave Mellor NJ]

How about used car dealers that put whole windshield-sized prices to get you to drive in to the lot only to see in micro-sized letters the word,"down". They do that in gas stations,too when prices are skyrocketing,with conditions like "with car wash"