RivNut Posted December 22, 2015 Share Posted December 22, 2015 Today I received an online copy of the Australian Riview and in it was this list of "What he said. What he meant!" It was composed my Tom Kunek and I hope that I'm not violating any copyright or patent infringements by posting it here for you to read. I think you'll get a kick out of it. Ed Tom Kunek, ROA #3845 sorts out the hype from the facts in his review of car sales euphemisms. From THE AUSTRALIAN RIVIEW What he said. What he meant!Restoration almost complete Missing vital parts like windscreen, panels and diffRestoration 80% complete Car is completely dismantled.TLC needed Total restoration requiredNeeds a little work Extensive restoration requiredShow car Not roadworthyMust sell I have plenty of time to think about your offerWill accept cheaper car as part payment I will never get full price on the $$$ I am askingKnown history The service books are long goneGreat promotional vehicle Totally impracticalGreat cruiser Unable to stop or go round corners.Has plenty of character #1 You will spend buckets of money to take part in this special experience.Has plenty of character #2 Odd people love this carHas plenty of character #3 Only nasty critics hated this carLots of sheet metal for you money Big without being roomy, slow without being quiet & heavy without being well equipped.Must sell - Going overseas Does anybody really care where I will be going?Firm Ring me in 2 months and I will still have the car.Country miles Very high milesConcurs winner I want plenty for this ride.All the hard work is done Run out of money and now it’s your turn.Older restoration Yes, but needs it again.No dreamers I want my asking priceOBO Try me.Rare No one wanted them then and almost no one nowVery rare A colossal failure when new.Reluctant sale I want to look desperateFully restored Looks really good to me.Rust - Some rust Completely riddled with rustRust - little rust Lots of rustRust - No rust #1 Possibly no rustRust - No rust #2 You can't see any rustRust - No rust #3 All rust painted over.Refund of airfare to interstate No one local will look at my car purchaserEconomical UnderpoweredCustom Spent lots of money which I will never recover Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Scott Mckenzie Posted December 22, 2015 Share Posted December 22, 2015 Or my favorite, "ran when parked " Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
trimacar Posted December 22, 2015 Share Posted December 22, 2015 I still get a kick out of "XXX original miles"....what other kind of miles are there? Non-original miles? That, and the ones that claim "only xxxx original miles, full nut and bolt restoration from a perfect original"....I would argue that if the engine has been apart and rebuilt, "original" or any other kind of miles totally lose their meaning. And I agree on "all the hard work is done"....really? If that's the case, finish the "easy" work and then try to sell it.... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Grimy Posted December 22, 2015 Share Posted December 22, 2015 My favorite, from a Hemmings ad in the 1970s, "Engine disassembled for your inspection." 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
RoadShark Posted December 22, 2015 Share Posted December 22, 2015 Left out: "'vette motor" Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
lrlforfun Posted December 22, 2015 Share Posted December 22, 2015 OK Buick People: My favorite....they missed it completely...New Old Stock, the biggest hoax in the old car hobby. (Next is patina). It ain't new because it was made 50 years ago. It may never have been used but that's no guarantee the part is in mint condition. Perhaps y'all can use the term "Unused old stock"? It's not used, it's old and may have been in inventory . Mitch Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
my first riv Posted December 24, 2015 Share Posted December 24, 2015 I think all of those fit perfectly and seems to be the case on any old vehicle I've ever looked at or worked on! Great post Ed!! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Seafoam65 Posted December 24, 2015 Share Posted December 24, 2015 I have another one........ Must sell due to illness...........Really means I am sick to death of this car! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
RivNut Posted December 24, 2015 Author Share Posted December 24, 2015 (edited) I have another one........ Must sell due to illness...........Really means I am sick to death of this car!That one should go to the top of the list. Should I be keeping track of the additions and adding them to the original? Update: I answered my own question. Now, for you guys who offered "what he said", I need to know "what he meant." Ran when parked - ???????Engine disassembled for your inspection - ?????? Thanks Edited December 24, 2015 by RivNut (see edit history) Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
DAVES89 Posted December 24, 2015 Share Posted December 24, 2015 (edited) That one should go to the top of the list. Should I be keeping track of the additions and adding them to the original? Update: I answered my own question. Now, for you guys who offered "what he said", I need to know "what he meant." Ran when parked - ???????Engine disassembled for your inspection - ?????? ThanksRan when parked means Stopped running so I parked it Engine disassembled for your inspection I took apart but don't know how to put it together again Edited December 24, 2015 by DAVES89 (see edit history) Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ScarredKnightfan Posted December 24, 2015 Share Posted December 24, 2015 LOL!!!! These are great! Needed the laugh today ... thank you. Cort www.oldcarsstronghearts.compigValve, paceMaker, cowValve | 1979 Caprice Classic (awaiting new owner)"Will I be merry or will I be blue?" __ Deborah Allen __ 'Rockin' Little Christmas' Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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