BUKE Posted May 21, 2011 Share Posted May 21, 2011 Let me see. I got my wife pregnant, I got my housekeeper pregnant, I've been accused of groping the girl, and I'm hiding a Buick roadmaster in the garage and I'm really feeling guilty about it I must tell my wife something to get the guilt out of me tell me what to say. I know I'll become a politician running for governor and I'll never have to tell her about the Buick have a great Buick day Frank L O L Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
JohnD1956 Posted May 22, 2011 Share Posted May 22, 2011 Buke! What the devil... Are you looking for trouble or are you really in trouble? Here's what I'd say:Honey, I can't hide this from you any longer. I have had an urge for about a year now, and I needed to have something I know you would not approve of. You see, a man has these urges a lot. More often than many women would ever know about. And sometimes the urges are so strong a weakness develops and a man just forgets about his obligations to his family and takes what he wants in the heat of passion. It's a sickness and I am guilty of satisfying my passion. I am sorry.Then if she says, : did you cheat on me? You say; Worse than that, I bought an old Buick. Then you get in the car and get the hell out of there as soon as possible. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MrEarl Posted May 22, 2011 Share Posted May 22, 2011 Buke take it from JD, the voice of experience. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Kingoftheroad Posted May 22, 2011 Share Posted May 22, 2011 Then if she says, : did you cheat on me? You say; Worse than that, I bought an old Buick. Then you get in the car and get the hell out of there as soon as possible.LMAO !!!! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ben Bruce aka First Born Posted May 22, 2011 Share Posted May 22, 2011 LMAO !!!! Me too!! Ben Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest 53Nailhead Posted May 22, 2011 Share Posted May 22, 2011 Buke! What the devil... Are you looking for trouble or are you really in trouble? Here's what I'd say:Then if she says, : did you cheat on me? You say; Worse than that, I bought an old Buick. Then you get in the car and get the hell out of there as soon as possible.I'm gonna have Jan call JD next time I do something stupid....and ya know it's gonna happen;) Just a matter of time..... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
NTX5467 Posted May 23, 2011 Share Posted May 23, 2011 Being single, I've not had that situation just yet . . . but . . .Dear, you know how passionate I tend to get about things sometimes, even if I might look stupid later on for having those feelings and urges. I do try to control them, but sometimes those thoughts just break out of the cubbyhole in the backside of my brain that I have exiled them too. Sometimes, these thoughts just see to make sense at the moment . . . and you know what happens after that! You'll have to admit that some of those times have been some of the most fun of our lives together. She smiles and agrees, but then the quizzical look appears and she asks "What did you do THIS time?" (Reply) Well, actually it was several things . . . She thinks some more and ponders "I knew about your 'wandering ways' and appreciation for 'shapely forms', plus that sometimes you couldn't keep you hands off of some of these 'beauties' . . . So where's the Buick you bought with OUR tax refund money???" Yes, a Beautiful Buick Roadmaster! Let me show it to you! As we head out to the back shop, she is seen to shake her head, thinking "Guess those blue pills affect him differently?"Key points . . . just as on "The Bold and the Beautiful", DNA tests can be altered if there's enough "motivation" for that to happen [that takes care of the housekeeper] other "silence" can be mutually beneficial, too [that can take care of the maid and the related lawyer] if enough money changes hands, hopefullyThe Buick? I'll have it finished in time to bring our new child home from the hospital in it! Won't that be grand!! [that gets the pregnant wife to say . . . "That's my George!"]Seems that if you act like you did something wrong, it will be "wrong" and have that "I've been naughty" connotation into the future. Having the Roadmaster revealed is just further proof that she'll know where you are at night.But Y'ALL know your spouses better than I know the one I don't have.Enjoy!NTX5467 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest brh Posted May 23, 2011 Share Posted May 23, 2011 Nothing to add just one thing to say myself.... "Fire in the Hole!!!":D Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dandy Dave Posted May 23, 2011 Share Posted May 23, 2011 Sounds like your in line with Arnold. When the females start squablin, just snarl and say, " I'll be baaack!" Then drive off in the fifty eight loaded full of guns, ammo, and Bombs. Dandy Dave! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
HurstGN Posted May 24, 2011 Share Posted May 24, 2011 All you have to do is honor the 11th commandment and you won't have all these troubles.What is the 11th commandment you ask?"Thou Shalt Not Share Thy Rod With Thy Staff" :eek: Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest AlK Posted May 25, 2011 Share Posted May 25, 2011 All you have to do is honor the 11th commandment and you won't have all these troubles.What is the 11th commandment you ask?"Thou Shalt Not Share Thy Rod With Thy Staff" :eek: NOW THAT I HAVE TO REMEMBER................................ Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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