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Questionable questions about your car?


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Once at a farm auction sale I saw a little boy with a man who looked like his grandfather. They were looking at a big iron pot. The boy asked what it was for and I said, the cannibals used to cook the missionaries in it. The old man laughed like hell.

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I was at a local show and a guy and his son were looking at an early Ford V8. The dad told the kid that it had a hemi in it. "You can always tell because the spark plugs are in the middle.", he said with great authority.

A guy at work told me that Cadillac built an inline 32 cylinder car back in the 30s. I told him that they built V8s, V12s and V16s but no inline engines, of any number of cylinders, in the 30s. He told me I was wrong because he "seen" one at a car show.

I was told my Mustang bike had a lawnmower engine. I told the guy it was not used in any lawnmower. He said he had one exactly like it, at home, on his mower.

The questions that I hear about my Boss Hoss bike are endless. How much does it weigh? (1100 lbs.) What do you do when it falls over? (I leave it there and go buy another one) Is it street legal? (Lesse, it has all the required equipment, it has a plate, I rode it here, what do you think?) How fast is it? (very) Is it a Harley? (No) Well. it looks like a Harley. My buddies Hayabusa will kick your a$$ (I couldn't care less. What do YOU have that's better?) How much did it cost? (A lot). I have one just like it except mine is a three wheeler with a VW engine. (Yup, a virtual clone of mine)

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I have a replica Cobra and invariably one of the questions that comes up is "is it real"

I have several answers I use....

1) you mean you see it too???

2) It is to me.

3) yes it is..... it's just not old.

4) (laugh) yeah right... the real ones are 5 million dollars and I would be afraid to drive it!!

but one of my favorites is...

5) My friend... Cobra's are like boobs....... even the fake one's are a lot of fun!! :D

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I always seem to get the experts that know more about my cars than I do. I once owned a 39 LaSalle that some guy at a show tried to convience me that someone swapped the engine because LaSalles came with straight 12 engines. That's why the long, narrow hood.

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I was told my Mustang bike had a lawnmower engine. I told the guy it was not used in any lawnmower. He said he had one exactly like it, at home, on his mower.

The questions that I hear about my Boss Hoss bike are endless. How much does it weigh? (1100 lbs.) What do you do when it falls over? (I leave it there and go buy another one) Is it street legal? (Lesse, it has all the required equipment, it has a plate, I rode it here, what do you think?) How fast is it? (very) Is it a Harley? (No) Well. it looks like a Harley. My buddies Hayabusa will kick your a$$ (I couldn't care less. What do YOU have that's better?) How much did it cost? (A lot). I have one just like it except mine is a three wheeler with a VW engine. (Yup, a virtual clone of mine)

This brings to mind the folks I get when I'm on my Harley. (FYI, I use a wheelchair since I broke my back 30+ years ago)...

"Is that your bike?" Nope, I figured it has a sidecar so I won't fall over, custom hand controls and a licence plate that says "HD GIMP" so it was my only opportunity to steal one! :confused:

"So you really ride that?" - Get this after they watch me get on/off it. (insert dumfounded look here)

"How do you ride it? From inside the sidecar?" - WTF are you talking about?? How would I ride the bike from inside the sidecar??

BTW, Love the BH bikes! A have a couple friends with them. Of course they're better than yours! So NYA NYA NYA! ;) I have met the guys who came up with them in Sturgis years ago. Great story about test rides before they figured out the clutch system. 2 big Guys held the rear wheel up via a lengthened axel, revs up to predetermined speed, dropped on the ground and WHEEEEEEEEEEEEEE! :eek:

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I was at a show years ago with a 55 Buick I owned. This car used to win best paint & bodywork in most shows we attended. Once a guy walked around the car a few times and asked what we used to paint it. My younger brother who actually did the car was quick to answer, "a vacuum cleaner"............The guy was amazed!:D

Edited by Skyking (see edit history)
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I drove my 35 Buick to work a few years ago and some redneck said " if you made that thing a four wheel drive then you'd have something"! My wife also asked me when she saw a Nissan commercial" what do they mean by a 35 ounce car? Meaning 350z. I still laugh at that one.

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I was at a show years ago with a 55 Buick I owned. This car used to win best paint & bodywork in most shows we attended. Once a guy walked around the car a few times and asked what we used to paint it. My younger who actually did the car was quick to answer, "a vacuum cleaner"............The guy was amazed!:D

I don't know if you are joking, but when I was in high school in the late 60's my buddy's grandparants had a Electolux vacuum cleaner store. Electrolux had a spray paint attachment that worked off the outlet of their canister vacuums. It was the first HVLP type spray gun. My buddy and his dad sprayed a couple cars with their Electrolux vacuum cleaner that came out pretty good. They would always put in a fresh bag to filter the air. His dad would paint and my buddy would follow him around the car carrying the vacuum because they only had about 10 ft of hose to work with.

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Probably my favorite is one my Dad got many times when he owned the FarmOroad I have now. I get the same question at most every show and use the same answer. Is it 4 wheel drive, yes when I put the dual wheels on. Or if they are on, I just point and say yes.

At a tractor/gas engine show this weekend with the FarmOroad I got a new one. I also had a Crosley fabricated engine and other Crosley stuff on display so I was getting lots of Crosley questions. A fellow comes up and is telling his friend that the Crosley wagons and sedans had little sticks that came out from the side of the door post to show you were turning. I told him they never had those. He argued with me for several minutes, since he remembered them when they were new. I said I have been into Crosleys for nearly 50 years and I knew they didn't, but several foreign cars used them. He said yep foreign like the Crosley. I then told him the Crosley was made in the USA in Ohio and Indiana. He then asked me what car he was thinking of then. I made several suggestions and he wondered off muttering to himself.

Doesn't fit the thread but a fellow that I had talked to earlier in the day about the Crosley stuff I was displaying as well as my 1950 Ford F1 came back with his blind wife. He had told her about the neat stuff I had (sheet metal engine, Icyball, FOR, F1, Crosley tractor, etc) and she wanted to come over to hear about it all. He said she sees with her hands is it alright to touch and I said go ahead. She started with the sheetmetal engine block. I picked it up so she didn't have to bend over and told her to hold out both hands and I handed it to her and told her she was holding an engine block. She got a big smile on her face. We went over everything I had there and she tells her husband (I'm guessing 40-50 years of marrage) that it didn't matter how long they had been together she liked my toys better than his and was going home with me. :-) When we got to the tractor I fired it up so she could hear as well as touch it and she really loved that.

Made the whole effort of hauling and setting up worth while.

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while this isn't a question, it is a statement I hear and always laugh inside,,,,

I had a car just like this one only is was a 4 door with a 6.....just like it huh?

Typically followed by "but mine was blue and a convertible". :rolleyes::D

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Boy this brings back memories.

Of my 1940 Packard;'Did you buy it new?". I was born in '51 and that was somewhere around 1990.

Of my 1964 GT Hawk with a 289: " Amazing that they couldn't afford their own engines (meaning a Ford)"

Of the Hawk: "I thought Studebakers had pointed fronts." :D

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Since I bought my 48 Chevrolet last Summer, I've been amazed at the people who stare at that big long Stovebolt 216 inline 6 under the hood, and ask me "Where can you buy gas for this thing?" I usually tell them that the local 7-11 stores sell it.

Regards:

Oldengineer

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Picture it , outside of nashville ((( goodletsville I think it was called ))) in a 1932 Ford Hi-Boy with a flat head V8 at a red light guy in his 30's or 40's pulls up beside me in a beautiful 70 challenger drop top right on the windsheild top it says " yes it's got a hemi and NO you can't drive it ,,, He leans over and yells NICE Hemi you got , mine really don't have a hemi and smilled , I leaned out the window and yelled , thank you and today is your lucky day if your looking for a Hemi for your Ride , he yelled back Pull over at that store as he pointed , I did and he did and he said he had a 440 six pack but always wanted a Hemi ((( all the time looking and mine and leaning on my radiator shell ))) without skipping a beat he said " whatta ya take for it " I told him I'm 12 hours from home but 10 grand and your motor and it's yours" he said I have 9 grand and I'll do the work , by this time I see this guy is Dead Serious so kindly followed him to his Pro Rod shop on Dickerson road outside of Nashville , by this time I'm on my Cell with my Wife Laughing , he opens the garage door Pulls in grabs wrenches and starts to take his hood off ,,, I said wait a second there Guy , you do know this is a flathead ford and not a Hemi right ? he spins around to face me looks me in the eyes and says " your an A-Hole " I kindly say sorry Man Figured all Hot Rodders Knew the Difference " so He pulls a Pistol out and yells you'll never embarass me again, throws the gun in his front seat slams his hood shut and walks away into the office , I jump in my Ford and Left town in a Big Hurry checking the rearview Mirror all the way to I-65 ,,, guess I should not have Lead him on ... BUT

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Picture it , outside of nashville ((( goodletsville I think it was called ))) in a 1932 Ford Hi-Boy with a flat head V8 (SNIP) ,,, guess I should not have Lead him on ... BUT

They guy had a sticker proclaiming his non-existent "Hemi" which indicated he was ignorant, then pulled out a gun and proved just how stupid he was. If you are willing to spend good money on ANYTHING, you should at least know what you're buying. I'd bet his great grandfather was the guy who bought the Brooklyn bridge! You never catch a "smart" fish do ya? :rolleyes:

These are the same type of idiots who have a big HD patch on their jackets, HD stickers on all their vehicles, have HD memorabilia all over the place yet ride a non-HD bike. :confused: I even saw a guy who had a Yamaha with all Harley sheet metal on it! That's a sheep in wolf's clothing if I ever saw it. But why??? He sure did get pissed when we bagged on his bike. Ride what ya ride, be proud of it or at least be honest with yourself and others.

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My 63 Riviera is a very nice car with a good paint job and almost perfect chrome. It has one or two flaws in the paint on the hood. I love it when someone looks it over and then points to a flaw (touched up chip) and then says "whats going on with this". Like I don't know every imperfection on my car.

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My 63 Riviera is a very nice car with a good paint job and almost perfect chrome. It has one or two flaws in the paint on the hood. I love it when someone looks it over and then points to a flaw (touched up chip) and then says "whats going on with this". Like I don't know every imperfection on my car.

"That's where I smashed a guy's forehead into the hood when he asked me a stupid question"

That should shut them up!

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Here are some of the "questionable" questions I get a lot...

  • While 2+ miles offshore at Lake of the Ozarks in my Amphicar a lady on a large boat asks... "Does that thing really float?
  • "How deep does it go?" (I'm still confused by what they mean)
  • "Why did you put propellors on your car?"
  • While at a stoplight in town... "Is that really a car too?"
  • "What kind of car is that? ... An Amphicar.... Who made it? ... Amphicar... What company made them... AMPHICAR!!"
  • Why did you convert your (Austin/57 Chevy/Sunbeam/studebaker) into this?"
  • "Can it sink?"

What kind of questions do you get?

There is a portion of old Route 66 that is now under Lake Springfield in Springfield, IL. I have always wanted to get an Amphicar, pile it up with Route 66 memorabilia, and drive around on Lake Springfield with a big map saying "I don't understand, the map says the road is supposed to be right here".

Edited by LINC400 (see edit history)
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Wow, I am surprised at the verity of DUMB questions posted that I have not been asked. I have a 1931 Hupmobile 6 cylinder that I take to local shows and some cruse ins.

I am under 70 and am also asked if I purchased it new 80 years ago and I thought I was the only one.

People see the "H" on the hubcap and ask me if it is a Hudson? When I say Hupmobile, thet then ask "A Hup what?".

When new, the sales information stated it was capable of speeds of 70 MPH. When asked how fast it will go, I usually say I drive about 55 in the interstate and 50 in 2 lane highways. Then they ask "Will it really go over 40 MPH?".

I always know I am in trouble when they ask "How many speeds does it have?" or "What is that thing in the floor in front of the seat?", or "Why does it have 3 peddles on the floor?".

When asked "Can you put modern gas in the car?", a friend once spoke up and said that 80 years ago the octane was only 60. He said the car runs better when I fill the tank about 1/3 with Kerosine to reduce the octane down from 92.

My classic was when a father was showing his 12 & 13 year old boys the wood spokes. One boy said they were not wood and the second told his dad they were steel painted to look like wood.

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Now that I've had the Cadillac out and about for a few weeks, I do get the "What kind of gas does it use?" question quite a bit. I also get asked about all the pedals on the floor (clutch, brake, accelerator, foot rest, starter), and people inevitably ask about the knob for the overdrive as well. The toolbox and battery box built into the splash aprons behind the running boards are so fascinating that I opened them up at the Stan Hywett show just so I could relax for a few minutes and stop answering THAT particular question. And yes, there's always, "How fast will it go?" I'll accept all those as reasonable questions from a non-antique car-savvy public.

I'm a little less patient with "What size tires are those?" when it's written in inch-high letters on the sidewall. Dawg, I be rollin' dubs! They're 20s, yo!

In terms of comments, they're almost universally positive. Everyone is enthusiastic about old cars and it seems to bring a smile to everyone's face as I drive. I love that--I just made someone's day just by driving down the street. Without exception, everyone is curious and respectful, and are happy to be corrected when they guess about features and how things work. After I park the car at the warehouse and drive home in my modern iron, I often find myself wondering why everyone isn't looking at me. Ha!

The only comment that kind of rubbed me wrong were the kids down at the Autozone who said they'd rip out the original engine and drop in a crate motor just so it would be reliable. Screw that--I'm guessing I've put almost 600 miles on the thing since I bought it and all I've done is put gas in it. The sucker seems reliable as hell.

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I don't know if you are joking, but when I was in high school in the late 60's my buddy's grandparants had a Electolux vacuum cleaner store. Electrolux had a spray paint attachment that worked off the outlet of their canister vacuums. It was the first HVLP type spray gun. My buddy and his dad sprayed a couple cars with their Electrolux vacuum cleaner that came out pretty good. They would always put in a fresh bag to filter the air. His dad would paint and my buddy would follow him around the car carrying the vacuum because they only had about 10 ft of hose to work with.

Yes, the Electrolux was what I was talking about. I still laugh over it.

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The only comment that kind of rubbed me wrong were the kids down at the Autozone who said they'd rip out the original engine and drop in a crate motor just so it would be reliable. Screw that--I'm guessing I've put almost 600 miles on the thing since I bought it and all I've done is put gas in it. The sucker seems reliable as hell.

How would that make it reliable. The original engine has already lasted 82 years, no crate motor has ever lasted 3O years. I have seen a few that did not last 1 year.

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How would that make it reliable. The original engine has already lasted 82 years, no crate motor has ever lasted 3O years. I have seen a few that did not last 1 year.

Yeah, as if all the backyard engineering required to get a crate motor into any old car is as reliable and dependable as factory engineered stuff. It bugs the hell out of me that people think an old car is inherently unreliable simply because it's old, and that a modern motor is the answer. Bah.

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