Seafoam65 Posted May 10, 2018 Share Posted May 10, 2018 (edited) The real reason why Mayberry was so peaceful is that nobody was married! Andy, Aunt Bea, Barney, Warren, Floyd, Howard, Gomer, Goober, Sam, Earnest T Bass, Helen, Thelma Lou, Clara and Opie were all single. The only married person was Otis and he stayed drunk all the time! Edited May 10, 2018 by Seafoam65 (see edit history) 3 3 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Bleach Posted May 10, 2018 Share Posted May 10, 2018 Things weren't that peaceful when Ernest T was around, He had a bad habit of running around town busting windows. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
auburnseeker Posted May 10, 2018 Share Posted May 10, 2018 Every town has their nut. If You only had one to worry about that spent most of their time in the mountains, chasing a Girl named Charlene, then I think we would all happily deal with it. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
RivNut Posted May 10, 2018 Share Posted May 10, 2018 (edited) Ernest T. Bass got the hots for Ramona Wiley. Ernest T. didnt have the charn or talents to woo Charlene away from Dud Wash. Edited May 10, 2018 by RivNut (see edit history) Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Zimm63 Posted May 10, 2018 Share Posted May 10, 2018 (edited) I wanna be like Ernest T when I grow up. Had a lady pushing a petition once, just wouldn't leave me alone. I signed it Ernest T Bass. She didn't get it and thanked me for supporting her cause. Edited May 10, 2018 by Zimm63 (see edit history) 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
60FlatTop Posted May 10, 2018 Share Posted May 10, 2018 2 hours ago, Zimm63 said: I signed it Ernest T Bass. She didn't get it and thanked me for supporting her cause. You may have missed a good one there. I would have been intrigued. Reminds me of a monthly supervisor's meeting I used to hold. During a little chat I complained that my Wife had broken the hood ornament off my '94 Roadmaster. "How'd she do that?" "Hit it with the snow brush this morning." "Didn't you drive it today?" "Yeah, she started it, cleaned it off, and drove it over close to the back door so I wouldn't have to walk through the snow." That meeting may have had the first "priceless" moment. They never treated me the same after. Their eyes kind of glazed over and they looked like they should be bringing some burnt offering. Bernie Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
RivNut Posted May 10, 2018 Share Posted May 10, 2018 When my daughters were really young, we were part of the YMCA's Parent / Child program. We'd meet as a large group at the Y, and sign in whether we were with the Indian Guides (boys) or Indian Princesses (girls) programs. After the general meeting, which ever group had the most in attendance got to stay in the room; the others moved to the basement. The girls group always stayed, thanks to the signing in of Johnnie Walker, Hiram Walker, Jack Daniels, and a few other notorious gentlemen. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
60FlatTop Posted May 11, 2018 Share Posted May 11, 2018 My Wife and I met another (married) couple at a parents without partners dance. Always a stickler for the rules, she signed her maiden name so she wouldn't get caught. I would open a used car lot in Mayberry- Generally Honest Bernie's Used Cars. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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