First snow. Gotta love this.

A friend sent this to me.

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DIARY OF A SNOW SHOVELER

December 8 - 6:00 PM

It started to snow. The first snow of the season and the wife and I took our cocktails and sat for hours by the window watching the huge soft flakes drift down from heaven. It looked like a Grandma Moses Print. So romantic we felt like newlyweds again. I love snow!

December 9

We woke to a beautiful blanket of crystal white snow covering every inch of the landscape. What a fantastic sight! Can there be a more lovely place in the whole world? Moving here was the best idea I've ever had! Shovelled for the first time in years and felt like a boy again. I did both our driveway and the sidewalks. This afternoon the snowplough came along and covered up the sidewalks and closed in the driveway, so I got to shovel again. What a perfect life!

December 12

The sun has melted all our lovely snow... Such a disappointment! My neighbour tells me not to worry- we'll definitely have a white Christmas. No snow on Christmas would be awful! Bob says we'll have so much snow by the end of winter, that I'll never want to see snow again. I don't think that's possible. Bob is such a nice man, I'm glad he's our neighbour.

December 14

Snow, lovely snow! 8 inches last night. The temperature dropped to -20. The cold makes everything sparkle so. The wind took my breath away, but I warmed up by shovelling the driveway and sidewalks. This is the life! The snowplough came back this afternoon and buried everything again.. I didn't realize I would have to do quite this much shovelling, but I'll certainly get back in shape this way. I wish I wouldn't huff and puff so.

December 15

20 inches forecast. Sold my van and bought a 4x4 Blazer. Bought snow tires for the wife's car and 2 extra shovels. Stocked the freezer. The wife wants a wood stove in case the electricity goes out. I think that's silly. We aren't in Alaska , after all.

December 16

Ice storm this morning. Fell on my ass on the ice in the driveway putting down salt. Hurt like hell. The wife laughed for an hour, which I think was very cruel.

December 17

Still way below freezing. Roads are too icy to go anywhere. Electricity was off for 5 hours. I had to pile the blankets on to stay warm.. Nothing to do but stare at the wife and try not to irritate her. Guess I should've bought a wood stove, but won't admit it to her. God I hate it when she's right. I can't believe I'm freezing to death in my own living room.

December 20

Electricity's back on, but had another 14 inches of the damn stuff last night. More shovelling! Took all day. The damn snowplough came by twice. Tried to find a neighbour kid to shovel, but they said they're too busy playing hockey. I think they're lying. Called the only hardware store around to see about buying a snow blower and they're out. Might have another shipment in March. I think they're lying. Bob says I have to shovel or the city will have it done and bill me. I think he's lying.

December 22

Bob was right about a white Christmas because 13 more inches of the white **** fell today, and it's so cold, it probably won't melt till August. Took me 45 minutes to get all dressed up to go out to shovel and then I had to ****. By the time I got undressed, pissed and dressed again, I was too tired to shovel. Tried to hire Bob who has a plough on his truck for the rest of the winter, but he says he's too busy. I think the ******* is lying.

December 23

Only 2 inches of snow today. And it warmed up to 0. The wife wanted me to decorate the front of the house this morning. What is she, nuts?!! Why didn't she tell me to do that a month ago? She says she did but I think she's lying.

December 24

6 inches - Snow packed so hard by snowplough, I broke the shovel. Thought I was having a heart attack. If I ever catch the son of a ***** who drives that snow plough, I'll drag him through the snow by his balls and beat him to death with my broken shovel. I know he hides around the corner and waits for me to finish shovelling and then he comes down the street at a 100 miles an hour and throws snow all over where I've just been! Tonight the wife wanted me to sing Christmas carols with her and open our presents, but I was too busy watching for the damn snowplough.

December 25

Merry f---ing Christmas! 20 more inches of the damn slop tonight - Snowed in. The idea of shovelling makes my blood boil.. God, I hate the snow! Then the snowplough driver came by asking for a donation and I hit him over the head with my shovel. The wife says I have a bad attitude. I think she's a fricking idiot. If I have to watch "It's A Wonderful Life" one more time, I'm going to stuff her into the microwave.

December 26

Still snowed in. Why the hell did I ever move here? It was all HER idea. She's really getting on my nerves.

December 27

Temperature dropped to -30 and the pipes froze; plumber came after 14 hours of waiting for him, he only charged me $1,400 to replace all my pipes.

December 28

Warmed up to above -20. Still snowed in. The ***** is driving me crazy!!!

December 29

10 more inches. Bob says I have to shovel the roof or it could cave in. That's the silliest thing I ever heard. How dumb does he think I am?

December 30

Roof caved in. I beat up the snow plough driver, and now he is suing me for a million dollars, not only the beating I gave him, but also for trying to shove the broken snow shovel up his ass. The wife went home to her mother. Nine more inches predicted.

December 31

I set fire to what's left of the house. No more shovelling.

January 8

Feel so good. I just love those little white pills they keep giving me.

Why am I tied to the bed?

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[TD][h=3]David Mellor <auburnelec@gmail.com>[/h][/TD]

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[TD=class: gH, align: right]11:58 PM (9 minutes a

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To paraphrase a popular comedian: "I don't care who you are, that there's funny!" It's also why I live in Florida and continue to feel lucky to have been born here.

I spent my latter teenage years in Chappaqua, New York and had my fill of snow shoveling/plowing. My first permanent duty station in the USAF was Great Falls, Montana where I experienced 45 degrees BELOW zero one morning on the flight line (no wind chill factor involved).

I have no desire whatsoever to even visit snow on a vacation. Water skiing - YES; snow skiing - NO!

Y'all enjoy the Great White North this winter. I'll enjoy watching the "winter wonderland" on TV.

Cheers,

Grog

Thinking about winter kinda gives you the willys:

Bernie

It must be the globel warming.

Here is what my drive from work looked like Monday

Believe it or not, there is a road in front of me in this picture

About 50 here today but the fcst is a double cold front later and tomorrow with maybe some snow. I'm as excited as the guy in the early part of the story..................Bob

Dave

Had a good laugh over this one.

Where can I find the site so that I can forward to my friends ?

I would like to say

THAT IS WHY I DO NOT LIVE IN MINNESOTA ANY MORE

Hey, nothing wrong with Minnesota that a blast of warm air or a plane ticket can't fix. That is why our birth rate spikes in August and September. Cheers from frigid Minnesnowta.

Thank you NJDave for this post.

JPHIL - I Googled for it and came up with this:

http://cedarspringspost.com/2013/12/27/diary-of-a-snow-shoveler-2/

Blessings to all,

Chuck in Kansas

That is why our birth rate spikes in August and September. Cheers from frigid Minnesnowta.

That only applies to those without a heated garage.

Likely many readers do not even know what snow fence is ! Wayne

Snow Fence??? (Actually, I know what it is...) Isn't that what the mountains in western NC are for? To keep the snow out....

We had a couple of inches in the mountains a few weeks ago, and all the stores sold out of bread, milk and eggs! (I've always wondered why folks made French toast when it snows....)

Back in March I called a friend in Pennsylvania to ask why he had not signed up yet for Autofair in Charlotte. He said, "As soon as the three feet of snow melts in front of my garage, I will!"

Thanks Chuck..

Tell me about it....... :mad:

I had a Monday appointment to get my '65 Mustang aligned.......so NATURALLY it snowed which means salt on the roads.

This car has NEVER seen salt and it won't as long as I own it.

As badly as I wanted to get that job done it will have to wait till next year now.......

I would like to say

THAT IS WHY I DO NOT LIVE IN MINNESOTA ANY MORE

Larry,

You are starting to sound like Shadetree, except he moved from Georgia. Talk to him now and he is getting a warmer heart for Michigan!.

Ski season almost here,,,got 10'' in northern Maine

last week,,,

Good turnout at the polls last tuesday,,

Got to vote on important issue

Bear trapping,,vote no,,pass it along,,ben

Whats global warming????,,,Must be good for Diezels eh!

One inch of ice in Nebraska..

Likely many readers do not even know what snow fence is ! Wayne

No foolin! That snow fence out West in places like Cheyanne is 12 to 16 foot high. Back here in the east we only have the 3 foot rolled up stuff. Dandy Dave!

It is snowing in Memphis this morning!! November 13!!!!

I've been in Germantown when it snowed. They shut the entire city down.

Having grown up in northern Pennsylvania, where

snow falls 3 to 4 times a week, I'm used to it--

and enjoy it! I'm surprised how many people,

especially those from a milder climate, are

apprehensive about it. It's a natural and normal

part of nature.

A friend of mine from Arizona--where they're not

accustomed to much rain--said that when it does rain,

people are almost afraid of it and there are lots of

highway accidents!

One girl I know said that when she was in college

a couple of years ago, they had 10 feet of snow.

I thought, "Oh, 120 inches for the season. Good--pretty typical."

She meant they had 10 feet of snow on the ground

all at once!

I remembered that being in the news at the time.

That was in a particularly snowy area of north-central New York.

Anytime you live due east of a Great Lake, you'd better

get used to driving in snow!

dan@larescorp...I live in Germantown. Dogwood Grove near Houston High School. Just west of Houston Levee. This is a three-ring circus when it snows. City does not own a plow. We get some cinders sprinkled on the major intersections and that's about it. Forty degrees this afternoon, twenty five overnight tonight. Global Warming.

I know right where your at. When I was operating my tree service we would come down there every January to trim trees. I stayed at the Homestead on Poplar Ave every year. That's only a few miles away from you just east of 240.

I remember seeing some very nice cars become very expensive insurance claims during the ice storm about 5 years ago.

Cheers from sunny Phoenix AZ .....:cool:

When I want to be reminded of my frigid childhood I travel 3 hours north to Flagstaff. No thanks...

dan@larescorp...Woodland and Michael's are taking down a big oak next door to me this morning. Dr. Ugly (Eddie Perry) was down the street a few days ago. You probably knew these guys in your Tree Service days.

Believe it or not I actually never ran into any competition while I was down there. That was one of the reasons I came back every year.

Larry,

You are starting to sound like Shadetree, except he moved from Georgia. Talk to him now and he is getting a warmer heart for Michigan!.

We know that after he experiences a blizzard or two that he'll be singin' a different tune; like " Georgia On My Mind! "

I love winter! Sadly, we've had above-freezing temperatures for days in Fairbanks, Alaska and most of our snow has melted. Global warming.

When it snows frequently, the mall parking lot isn't plowed

often enough, so the snow just packs down into a solid white layer

that covers all the pavement and striping. People can't see the lines of

the parking spaces and have to guess where they should park!

It's a lot of fun seeing zigzag rows that taper from wide to narrow.

Nancy in Fairbanks: Is that what they typically do in your town?

And by the way, when it's very cold (say minus 10 degrees F.) the snow

is squeaky and gives pretty good traction.

70 F near Charleston, SC as I write this. I lived in Iowa for twenty years. Like the author above we enjoyed the snow the first year, but soon even the kids got tired of it. When the temperature would drop below zero I would get mad at myself. I would think "most of these people have lived here all their life and don't realize they don't have to live this way. I Know better but am here anyway."

I enjoyed the post.

Don

70 F near Charleston, SC as I write this. I lived in Muscatine, Iowa for twenty years. Like the author above we enjoyed the snow the first year, but soon even the kids got tired of it. When the temperature would drop below zero I would get mad at myself. I would think "most of these people have lived here all their life and don't realize they don't have to live this way. I Know better but am here anyway."

I enjoyed the post.

Don

My uncle moved from Minnesota to California some years back. His explanation of why people live up here was the best I've heard so far.

We all suffer from extreme brain freeze. He said it took about two years after he moved down there for it to thaw out. Once it did he realized he didn't have to put up with our weather.

Just a cool blast of wind out of the North-NorthEast this morning !!

We get a dusting of snow -

maybe a Quarter-Inch or so,

once every ten years on average...

I do enjoy not having to shovel like I had to do when I was younger in New Jersey, Upstate New York, Indiana, and Virginia.

I also enjoy not getting to work with slush in my socks like when I worked in Mid-Town Manhattan...

... the snow

is squeaky and gives pretty good traction.

Is that like Sponge Bob Square Pants in his Squeaky boots? LOL.. Yup, been in Squeaky snow before. Dandy Dave!

One girl I know said that when she was in college

a couple of years ago, they had 10 feet of snow.

I thought, "Oh, 120 inches for the season. Good--pretty typical."

She meant they had 10 feet of snow on the ground

all at once!

I remembered that being in the news at the time.

That was in a particularly snowy area of north-central New York.

Anytime you live due east of a Great Lake, you'd better

get used to driving in snow!

Possibly the girl that reported 10 feet of snow on the ground had the brain freeze the other poster talked about ( lol ).

Wayne

We got 2'' heavy stuff last nite,,,think ILL ignore it

here in southern Maine,,,Ben

We also woke up to the first snow fall of the season. One day before opening day of Deer season when a riffle can be used. Usually 50's this time of the year. Snow and constant cold usually does not come until the middle to the end of deer season. Dandy Dave!

Wayne thought that the girl that reported 10 feet of snow might

have had "brain freeze." Since I made a hard-to-believe claim, I'll

document it! The documentation actually makes the subject more

interesting. Here's the link from NBC News' website:

http://www.nbcnews.com/id/17094120/ns/weather/t/ny-town-misses-snowfall-record/#.VGYRjzTF-zY

Here are a couple of quotations from that article:

REDFIELD, N. Y. [Oswego County] --The lake-effect squalls that have buried

parts of upstate New York in nearly 12 feet of snow finally ended Monday,

leaving road crews with the task of clearing snow piled as high as street signs."...

"Redfield received 11 feet, 9 inches of snow, but residents were unfazed in a

community where the economy thrives on snowmobilers and cross-country

skiiers. The area receives an annual average of more than 22 feet.

'It's not really anything we'll get excited about,' Town Clerk Elaine Verdon

said. 'It's not an unusual amount. It's just unusual that it fell in such a short

period of time.' " [End of Quote]

To those accustomed to snow, snow isn't something to be afraid of.

For those mild-climate folks who think we're suffering from snow,

please know that many people--especially the young at heart--

enjoy winter. It's hard to go sledding, snowmobiling, or watch the

sled-dog races when you have only 4 inches of snow that last 4 days.

Towns are proud of their high snowfalls, and almost

enjoy "beating out" near-by towns in the snow-measuring scoresheet!

Whistler, British Columbia routinely gets 400 inches in a typical winter.